Literary Vomit

Hello, Internet!

I just want to say that I hate this piece. This is maybe the worst jumble of synonyms I've ever had the displeasure of staring at for the past two hours. I am reminded of another work that I've read. This one. Go ahead. Click on it. Read it. Just the first few paragraphs will do. I'll wait......................................................................................................................

OK. That essay that you just read was randomly generated through a computer algorithm that takes a bunch of dictionaries and smooches them all together in a way that makes grammatical sense. It was diarrhea of the pen. That being said, my analysis follows.

In the piece mentioned so eloquently above, the author makes a rather revolutionary claim. He says that in order to be successful, and beyond that, a good person, is to be headstrong and opinionated. All I have to do to make a fortune is to have my own belief, let no one else tell me otherwise, and base my entire life off of it. He even goes so far as to say that once you come up with your set of beliefs (ie I think that potato pancakes are all that people should ever eat), all of your actions must be consistent with that belief. The author gives the example of charity. He thinks that it is stupid to donate money to the poor because, in this example, the poor have nothing to do with eating potato pancakes.

Furthermore, the author also states that it is OK to change your opinions, sets of beliefs, etc., as long as you truely believe it. Today I could think that we should drill for oil in Alaska, spend 28 billion dollars on making that happen, and then tomorrow totally change my mind and use that money to campaign against oil drilling. And I would be a better person because of it, as long as today I am as convinced of my opinions as I will be tomorrow. What?!?!

I rather disagree with that. The author says that you need to be a dissenter. Thats OK, I guess, but what if the "norm" is really what you think too? I agree that it's good to have a personal set of beliefs, but if they keep you from living your life to the best and fullest it can be, then are they really good beliefs? I am reminded of F. Scott Fitzgerald's "The Crack-Up" when he becomes a writer, and nothing else. He wouldn't even feed someone who was dying from starvation unless it helped his writing. Phs, I say. 

The end.